Dear Hermia & Helena… Yours, Dorothy Gale

Our two advice columnists respond to a plea from the marvellous land of Oz

Dear Hermia & Helena

Oh wise ones, I am Dorothy the small and meek. I am setting out on a long and arduous journey, and seek assistance.

I have been transported to a strange land, home to a wondrous variety of unusual creatures including – I tremble to think of it – witches and wizards. My heart’s desire is to return home to Kansas, to my aunt and uncle, but I have been told that to do this I must seek the help of a great wizard. He lives in a city built of emeralds, and the way there is dark and perilous.

I am protected by the kiss of a good witch, and I trust and hope that I will find help along the way – but oh! I am so scared. I am only an ordinary girl, and cannot imagine what I will do if I encounter such dread beasts as I have heard of: flying monkeys, evil witches and the like.

How shall I win through? All I know is that I must not stray from the yellow brick road, but aside from that I am at a loss. I am alone, and in grave need – please, can you help me?

Yours,

Dorothy Gale

Our Dear Dorothy

As thou set’st out upon the yellow road,
Remember this: thy hope will lead thee home.
The kindness that thou to the Munchkins showed
Will stand thee in good stead where’er thou roam.
Companions three wilt meet along the way;
Brains, heart and courage wilt thou help them seek;
For thou art not alone: let none this say!
And friends will rally round the small and meek.
Thou wilt be tested; evil wilt thou face;
To please the wizard must thou kill the witch;
And water yet may be thy saving grace:
When time doth come, a bucket must thou pitch!
……..Thy soul is steady, strong and all afire;
……..And, at the end, wilt gain thy heart’s desire.

Yours,

Hermia & Helena